Saturday, February 21, 2009

Horse Tails

The Man is baffled by the mysterious swiping of horse tails. The tails, we're told, could take 10 years to grow back, which equates to a lot of mosquito bites on the fanny.

In England, they blame a cult of "horse rippers" who have, after cutting tail, bled horses to death and left stones arranged in as Satanic symbols.

We have our own theory after learning of a hair weave that stopped a speeding bullet.

Meanwhile, we'll leave you with this thought from an old time horseman: "If they were mean horses, [the thieves] would have never gotten away with it."

So what's your take?

* Violin bow makers?
* Rump shot affectionadoes?
* Bullet proof wig makers?
* Mistaken for a goat?


  1. Baffled. Maybe just pranksters or people making hatbands. Could be any number of mundane to weird explanations. But I suppose the possibility of applying the word "mundane" to a mysteriously missing horse tail is open to question.

  2. What's especially curious to me is that it seems to be happening in so many different places and times.

    Meanwhile, that hair-weave-stopping-the-bullet incident! The military ought to look into this...

  3. Just some kids horsing around....(groan)

    Yeah that bullet must've been one lazy little fucker! But you know, kevlar etc works on the principle of the weave....the spinning bullet gets wound up in the threads. So, it's not entirely shocking a hair weave could stop a little bullet. Some of those things are pretty dense.


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